Elephants have been on my mind for the last few days. That sentence is alarming to me. Not being a zoo keeper or a safari leader, I don't have a whole lot of good reasons to be contemplating elephants. Do I really need a good reason? I have three reasons, anyway.
Reason #1 For the Recent and Alarming Contemplation of Elephants:
The Republican "debates" and stuff. This is something I have studiously avoided hearing about, but hear about nonetheless. When I explain to people that I do not pay attention to such things, I invariably get the same sort of response: something about staying informed, or my civic responsibility, or being in the know. These appeals used to bother me, but I've discovered there are some things I'd rather not know. I like to think I am a relatively intelligent person. It's not that I'm not capable of following political discourse, it's not even that I'm not interested in politics, it's that I refuse. Just no. Increasingly over the last 12-16 years things have become depressing to me. The presidential race is like a 2-year long reality TV show where we all watch and opine about people's hair and their clothes, make political decisions based on our "guts" rather than on logic or any sort of fundamental knowledge of the Constitution or law. Whoever gets the best one-liner for the day gets to stay on the island. Whoever buzzes in with the right catchphrase gets to go on to the next round. And we let them. We let them by participating, by circulating the videos of the latest moronic thing someone said when they thought the mic was turned off, by watching the "news" and repeating the talking points, by rising to the vitriolic bait that's thrown our way.
Case in point: gay marriage. This is becoming a central campaign issue, again. Gay marriage is to the new millennium what abortion was to the eighties and nineties. I bet even in reading that last sentence, it conjured a spark of emotional response. What is she going to say about it? Where does she stand? Here's the thing, though: that's why it's an issue. It attacks you right in your amygdala. It doesn't matter which side of the issue you fall on, it will piss off people on the other side. It's like a homing beacon. One candidate emits a signal that attracts us on a cellular level, another emits a signal that repels us. These kinds of issues are fraught with emotion, with personal experience, with fear, with hatred and with very little sense.
From a purely governmental perspective, does it benefit the function of government to deny certain people civil unions? Absolutely not. It would probably be beneficial in the long run and save money in costly legal battles and legislative snare-ups to just give it all the go-ahead. And while we're at it, from a purely governmental perspective, does it matter if any two people getting married love each other or are morally upstanding? Absolutely not. There are far too many hetero marriages that prove that point for me.
So why, then? Why is this even an issue? Why are we talking about it? Why can't we just make civil unions legal and be done with it? The legislators on both sides of the aisle know that it makes good sense, both politically and economically. Regardless of what they say, most citizens who oppose it know in their heart of hearts that after the news cycle dies down, it will affect their life probably not at all. But yet again this election cycle, it's an issue. Why? Because it makes everyone so emotional. Because it's sexy. Because everyone seems to feel strongly about it one way or another. Because it's a surefire way to divide people and draw up camps along party lines. It gets dangled out there every election cycle, well, because it dangles. It makes us think of all manner of evil people get up to in their bedrooms and oh! won't someone think of the children?! And we buy it. Some of us try to have a rational discussion about it. Some of us act on instinct. Some of us are horrified and some of us are intrigued, but we all fall for it.
This is politically a non-issue. There is no reason that in 21st century, post civil rights movement America that anyone should be legislatively excluded. Case closed. The contestants in the electoral game know this, but they also know that the issues that really hit us where we live aren't so easy to make posters of. They're issues that affect everyone, across the board. They're issues, that regardless of party affiliation or political leanings, are crushing the American spirit. A lot of the issues we face today have been decades in coming and there are not easy, 8-year solutions to them. They are so big, so entangled, so unwieldy that we can't even think about them properly. So they play the sleight of hand tricks, pander to emotions and we all get to ignore the elephant in this particular room. Personally, I find this reprehensible. I find the hijacking of the American political process by charlatans and show-biz to be utterly inexcusable. The fact that it is done on the backs of citizens who unquestionably deserve equal rights is disgusting.
So I stop listening. I tune out. I'm not really missing much, but I'm gaining a ton. I meet nice people everywhere I go. I get to think for myself. I get to make decisions based on my own faith, my own beliefs, my own morality, without the interference of so much noise. I live my small life from day to day, choosing what's important to me, rather than being told. It has been a delightfully surprising discovery over the last several years that my whole outlook on life, and on people in general, has changed for the better. I get to make judgments based on tangible interaction with actual human beings, real life situations.
I have friends from every sector of the political map and guess what? We all get along. I find things to love about all of them. I find things that we hold deeply in common. I find things I can learn from them. I find beautiful people who are working hard and doing the best they can. I've watched people take punches from all directions and survive. Not just survive, but live joyfully. I've watched people come together and help each other out. I've watched people celebrate together, mourn together, eat together, work together and live together. These are far more valuable to me than which bubble to fill in on my ballot. These are the people who are going to make a change. These are the people who keep this country (and countries all over the world) alive. This is where it matters. We can have all the legislation in the world, trying to make everyone live and do just so, but that won't change people's hearts. But you know what will? A loaf of bread for the new neighbors, a jump for a stranger's dead battery in the grocery store parking lot, a get well card, a "you go first" to the person behind you in a long line, helping a child find his mother in a crowded room, looking up and saying hi when you walk past someone on the street. These and all of the millions of little opportunities we have every week to do something to remind us that we are human.
Thank you for tolerating my righteous little rant. Stay tuned for other fun elephant-related news tomorrow.
Reason #1 For the Recent and Alarming Contemplation of Elephants:
The Republican "debates" and stuff. This is something I have studiously avoided hearing about, but hear about nonetheless. When I explain to people that I do not pay attention to such things, I invariably get the same sort of response: something about staying informed, or my civic responsibility, or being in the know. These appeals used to bother me, but I've discovered there are some things I'd rather not know. I like to think I am a relatively intelligent person. It's not that I'm not capable of following political discourse, it's not even that I'm not interested in politics, it's that I refuse. Just no. Increasingly over the last 12-16 years things have become depressing to me. The presidential race is like a 2-year long reality TV show where we all watch and opine about people's hair and their clothes, make political decisions based on our "guts" rather than on logic or any sort of fundamental knowledge of the Constitution or law. Whoever gets the best one-liner for the day gets to stay on the island. Whoever buzzes in with the right catchphrase gets to go on to the next round. And we let them. We let them by participating, by circulating the videos of the latest moronic thing someone said when they thought the mic was turned off, by watching the "news" and repeating the talking points, by rising to the vitriolic bait that's thrown our way.
Case in point: gay marriage. This is becoming a central campaign issue, again. Gay marriage is to the new millennium what abortion was to the eighties and nineties. I bet even in reading that last sentence, it conjured a spark of emotional response. What is she going to say about it? Where does she stand? Here's the thing, though: that's why it's an issue. It attacks you right in your amygdala. It doesn't matter which side of the issue you fall on, it will piss off people on the other side. It's like a homing beacon. One candidate emits a signal that attracts us on a cellular level, another emits a signal that repels us. These kinds of issues are fraught with emotion, with personal experience, with fear, with hatred and with very little sense.
From a purely governmental perspective, does it benefit the function of government to deny certain people civil unions? Absolutely not. It would probably be beneficial in the long run and save money in costly legal battles and legislative snare-ups to just give it all the go-ahead. And while we're at it, from a purely governmental perspective, does it matter if any two people getting married love each other or are morally upstanding? Absolutely not. There are far too many hetero marriages that prove that point for me.
So why, then? Why is this even an issue? Why are we talking about it? Why can't we just make civil unions legal and be done with it? The legislators on both sides of the aisle know that it makes good sense, both politically and economically. Regardless of what they say, most citizens who oppose it know in their heart of hearts that after the news cycle dies down, it will affect their life probably not at all. But yet again this election cycle, it's an issue. Why? Because it makes everyone so emotional. Because it's sexy. Because everyone seems to feel strongly about it one way or another. Because it's a surefire way to divide people and draw up camps along party lines. It gets dangled out there every election cycle, well, because it dangles. It makes us think of all manner of evil people get up to in their bedrooms and oh! won't someone think of the children?! And we buy it. Some of us try to have a rational discussion about it. Some of us act on instinct. Some of us are horrified and some of us are intrigued, but we all fall for it.
This is politically a non-issue. There is no reason that in 21st century, post civil rights movement America that anyone should be legislatively excluded. Case closed. The contestants in the electoral game know this, but they also know that the issues that really hit us where we live aren't so easy to make posters of. They're issues that affect everyone, across the board. They're issues, that regardless of party affiliation or political leanings, are crushing the American spirit. A lot of the issues we face today have been decades in coming and there are not easy, 8-year solutions to them. They are so big, so entangled, so unwieldy that we can't even think about them properly. So they play the sleight of hand tricks, pander to emotions and we all get to ignore the elephant in this particular room. Personally, I find this reprehensible. I find the hijacking of the American political process by charlatans and show-biz to be utterly inexcusable. The fact that it is done on the backs of citizens who unquestionably deserve equal rights is disgusting.
So I stop listening. I tune out. I'm not really missing much, but I'm gaining a ton. I meet nice people everywhere I go. I get to think for myself. I get to make decisions based on my own faith, my own beliefs, my own morality, without the interference of so much noise. I live my small life from day to day, choosing what's important to me, rather than being told. It has been a delightfully surprising discovery over the last several years that my whole outlook on life, and on people in general, has changed for the better. I get to make judgments based on tangible interaction with actual human beings, real life situations.
I have friends from every sector of the political map and guess what? We all get along. I find things to love about all of them. I find things that we hold deeply in common. I find things I can learn from them. I find beautiful people who are working hard and doing the best they can. I've watched people take punches from all directions and survive. Not just survive, but live joyfully. I've watched people come together and help each other out. I've watched people celebrate together, mourn together, eat together, work together and live together. These are far more valuable to me than which bubble to fill in on my ballot. These are the people who are going to make a change. These are the people who keep this country (and countries all over the world) alive. This is where it matters. We can have all the legislation in the world, trying to make everyone live and do just so, but that won't change people's hearts. But you know what will? A loaf of bread for the new neighbors, a jump for a stranger's dead battery in the grocery store parking lot, a get well card, a "you go first" to the person behind you in a long line, helping a child find his mother in a crowded room, looking up and saying hi when you walk past someone on the street. These and all of the millions of little opportunities we have every week to do something to remind us that we are human.
Thank you for tolerating my righteous little rant. Stay tuned for other fun elephant-related news tomorrow.
You know how lots of people have a favorite critter? Maybe penguins, or frogs? Mine is elephants. Since I was a kid, I have been fascinated by them. I have elephant figures all over my house. Elephants are wise; they promote cogent thought. Your ability to present a calm and rational approach to a volatile topic, is like aloe vera plant to a burn. Takes away the sting; creates a calming environment. Look forward to next installment.
ReplyDeleteI completely agree that religion and state are two entities that should remain separate. I feel the same way up here in Canada, where the most 'pressing' issues are similar in nature...
ReplyDeleteOn a more positive note, here is a video of elephants that is incredibly moving: have you seen it?
http://www.globalanimal.org/2011/07/07/elephant-mother-saves-newborn-video/44610/
Thank you for articulating my feelings so well. I avoid political 'stuff' and especially hate election year.I hate the ads and the news coverage- all of it. And, with two of those Republicans having very strong Utah ties, we're getting a double dose. I'll be so glad when November is over!
ReplyDeleteIt's so funny to see things I've thought living outside my head, written down by someone else. I wrote a post during the last Presidential election that actually mentioned the "gut" instinct voting thing and how there are always people moaning about how not enough people vote and not enough people are engaged in the process, but to me, there is very clearly a way in which TOO many people vote and participate in the "process" in a solely superficial way. And I believe it's absolutely true that the candidates and the parties as a whole pander to the lowest common denominator. It's a shame, really, that the system as it is drives away or excludes the very people who might stand a chance of having positive influence.
ReplyDeleteThat being said, when it comes to the "debate" about gay marriage, I am prone to losing my flipping mind a little. There is no rational legal argument against it, many for it, and therefore, as you say, it shouldn't even BE a question. The problem is that the people getting so wound up about aren't always coming from a rational place so rational argument holds no sway. Not, of course, that I stay rational about it in the face of irrationality or even indirectly, when I'm essentially just arguing in my head with everyone whose ever made an ignorant comment in my presence on the subject--as this rambling comment would tend to show.
I think your idea about changing the world on a smaller scale--heart by heart--is huge. I really try to consciously live that way every day and I don't know how big of a difference it makes to anyone else, but the difference it makes to me makes all the difference. If that makes any sense.
@Mark - Thank you for such kind description of my rantings. I love elephants, too. The real ones.
ReplyDelete@cdnkaro - I have often considered defecting to Canada. Thank you for that video. It's beautiful.
@Jewels - I feel your pain. We lived in a "swing state" during the 2004 election and just stopped answering the door or the phone. It was awful.
@MM - Last things first: that makes all the sense and in fact, the sense I was trying to make. Living like that changes you and eventually it catches on and even if it doesn't at least you know you're OK. Also, the answering rational argument with irrational rantings is one of those things that drives me nuts. Not that we don't all fall prey to it from time to time, but as a means for a whole political process? I am going to run for president and answer every question given to me with: "So's your face!" It makes about as much sense.
I'm secretly relieved that some people agree with me. I was a little worried about a political-ish rant, but so's your face.
I SO appreciate your "righteous little rant" - You say it so well. You amaze me. I second every word you wrote --I have become so disillusioned with national politics. The priorities are often so skewed and the the media manipulation is insulting. I do believe that we each have the power to effect change in our world - in our town, our neighborhood, our family, our selves. I can do that in the little ways of which you speak. But then I have to cut myself some slack and be okay with that. You gave me permission to do just that. Thank you! On more than one level.
ReplyDeleteYou are welcome. It was very difficult for me at first to tune out and feel okay with it. There's a certain expectation of people of a certain intelligence and education level that you'll just be "in the know", that it's somehow less intelligent to be "uninformed". It has taken some mental gymnastics to accept that what I was keeping myself "informed" of was at best inconsequential to me and at worst, damaging to my psyche and that the only reason I kept up with things was so I could sound intelligent in conversation when it came up. Now I get to say "I have no idea what you're talking about" and feel good about it.
DeleteMaybe it's just my chronic state of sleep deprivation, but "So's your face!" was desk-slappingly funny. Laugh-til-it-hurts funny.
ReplyDeleteWhat's your platform? So's your face!
What's your stand on gun control? So's your face!
How does knowing the president of Uz-beki-beki-beki-stan-stan help our economy? So's your DAMN face!!
Love it. Obviously. ;)
@MM - glad I could give you a good laugh. This is actually how arguments are resolved in our house. If you holler "so's your face" at someone, everyone wins. Laughing too hard to remember what you were arguing about.
ReplyDeleteI'd vote for you. I'm 100% behind your campaign slogan.
ReplyDeleteSo's your face. I'm so not running for president. There will never be a socialist elected to that high an office in this country.
DeleteThank you, thank you for this post! I needed to hear every word of it! Having recently moved from the PNW to the South I've been having a hard time dealing with politics lately. I try to avoid any conversation of politics (not because I don't care but because I'm grossly out numbered by people who disagree with me and their views make me really anxious) because I have to live near and socialize with people who have very different views than my own. But I hear a lot more than I'd like and it's so hard sometimes. People assume I believe the same as they do and make the worst comments...sometimes it's hard to focus on the good things! I wish everyone did their own research and made educated decisions instead of picking the candidate that goes to their church and thoughtlessly repeating their slogans. Ugh. So's your face! Thank you!
ReplyDelete@Emily - Oh honey, my heart really goes out to you. We moved to the PNW from the South and it was like a breath of fresh air in more ways than one. I understand all too well being "grossly outnumbered". Hang in there. You could try the "So's your face!" approach. Might confuse them long enough to make a getaway.
ReplyDeleteWe moved from Colorado to Arizona to TEXAS, of all places. In 2008, Colorado went blue, while AZ and TX stayed blood red. I tell people I don't live in Texas. I live in Austin. Big difference.
ReplyDeleteThen again, so's your face!
Huge difference. Austin is a wonderful little entity unto itself in the Federal Republic of Texas.
Delete